Well.. Crushing is a very natural thing and feeling. Nobody should go all religious about it, because You do not have control over; Who You would have a crush on, however, You have control over how You handle the crush situation.
Its is not a sin to see someone and really like the Person, but it turns a sin when negative energies and thoughts are channeled into the likeness.
Well, here’s My story about a crush I had, and Probably Our similar crushing experience. Maybe in a different storyline.
Here, in this great 3 weeks in May, when I was supposed to be consecrating Myself, I found Myself in crush with this Dude.. Here’s how it started.
There I was, watching the Musicians do Their thing. Known to all who know Me, I Am a Music Person. Enjoying the show right in front of Me, I gave My best concentration; until I turned side ways. Then I locked eyes with Him. The anonymous, cause He is Famous. Strange. I tooked away, but rather in a couple of seconds looked back that direction and Our eyes locked again. Like We planned it.
Well, that happens right? But then, It wasn’t just a regular “happens” because it became intense.. Every time I looked, We locked eyes.. So for the rest of the event, it was that way..
There I was, closing one eyes, and looking with the other eyes if He was watching. And yes He was. Maybe My looking back at Him triggered His looking too.. But which ever case, We both started committing lookery. (the act of looking)
I gave the whole worship I had for two weeks in that service,just so He could feel like Whoa! She’s a Lover of GOD. Which is not a lie, because even in that whole scene, I was trying to focus on GOD.
I Danced so much just to make a dance impression, that I almost broke My back bone.
Well, good thing was ; I wasn’t in the crush thing alone. He gave Me a good show, as much as I did Him.
When He had a function, He always looked out for Me, which of cause gave Me so much delight.
This went on for weeks.. And yes I saw Him everyday because of the function We had to attend.
Ah! Most renowned, perpetual late comer like Me, became a fervent punctual Personality(FPP); Just so I’d sit in a place where He would see Me.
This Faithful day, I got to the venue and My phone rang, on picking the call, He walked out of the gate.. Shy and tensed I walked pass Him. He mumbled a Hi but I couldn’t reply cause I was on the phone. Which ended almost immediately. I was so upset because I just missed a Hi reply to My crush. Which probably would have led to something else. Well, there will be other chances. I went in, got a seat at His favorite spot. I decided to step out to go create “other chances”. On stepping out, there He was with His folks so walked into the rest room to pretend pee..
So! I Met Him at the ATM booth.. And yeah.. He was side looking at Me, then His folk picked up a conversation with Me, and all He did, was side stare. In My mind, I was like… Move away, its not You I want to talk to. But I talked so much and loud so He could hear My voice that sounds like a singing bird. Till We said Our goodbyes.
Oh! This Bless day, I was all dressed to impress.. Whew.. Getting in, I did the usual getting a seat close to His spot. Then battling with Myself on whether or not to go out and use the rest room. Finally, the “go” won and I walked out. This time for reals I didn’t expect it. Opening the glass framed door, guess Who rolled up on Me.. Yes! Him! With the shock in both Our eyes, cold feeted, shy, and air drained. I bowed My head and slid pass Him. Without turning I walked until I was out of sight. Stopping, I sucked in so much air to keep from fainting, due to the lack of air in My lungs. During the service, lookery all the way..
So this Magnificent day, My Friends decided to keep a seat for Me..But nah.. Not in a favorable position. When He came up for a function, I could see Him clearly. Infact, He jumped often to My axis as though He was going to fall off the podium.
Then GOD was all ready to bring Us back.. The speaker talked exactly about lookery as though someone reported Us.. After everything, I realised We had been sinning. Not because We prolly liked one another, not that Our thoughts were bad.. At least for Me, all I was wishing was that We become close Friends. So no bad thoughts. But the fact that We let it distract Us from Our main Course.GOD. Cause at some point, not that I didn’t enjoy the Presence of GOD and the event I was attending. I found pleasure in the distraction of wanting to go everyday to see this Dude. After all said, the service was over. Coincidentally, They had a benediction right in front of My Friends and I, I caught Him peeking severally to look at Me.. But I refused looking directly at Him. Nigga didn’t U hear what the Preacher preached? So We stood up and left. Sadly, I realized I only had a passing crush on Him. A fling without physicals.